Posted by Dr Fro 10:05 PM

Two very funny exchanges

#1 Jimmy the Fish

Background:
The 1994 World Cup final was on and Ferruzzo and I were in college. Italy was playing Brazil. Being an Italian American, Jimmy the Fish (aka Ferruzzo) was pulling for Italy. Being a contrarian and an antagonist, I was pulling for Brazil.

Exchange:

JF: "I can't believe we lost to a bunch of Mexicans."

CF: "They aren't Mexicans. They are Brazilians."

JF: "You know what I mean. They speak Spanish, so they are basically a bunch of Mexicans."

CF: "They don't speak Spanish. They speak Portuguese."

JF: "Whatever. They have freaking dark skin and greasy black hair."

CF: "So do Italians."

JF: "Get the f^ck out of my room!"

#1 Talkie Talk

Background:

Hickey and I drove to Winstar on Monday to play some Holdem. (We made a tiny amount in $4-$8 fixed limit and lost it and a bit more at $1-$2 at NL HE. A fun time.) I am at a $1-$2 HE game that is pretty boring until a guy sat down that I will call Talkie Talk. He talked for four straight hours. Evidently, according to him, he is the greatest gambler of all time. Perhaps you believe him. I am skeptical. He sat next to a very nice guy in a Party Poker visor. I called him Party Poker.

Exchange:

TT: "Dude I just won $750 at black jack. I should quit my job and play blackjack."

PP: "How can you possibly expect to make money at blackjack without counting cards?"

TT: "With 6 decks you can't count cards. You can't. No, I got an approach." (Notice he didn't say "system". That would have been too perfect) "

PP: "What approach?"

TT: "If I sit down with a bunch of losers that don't play by the book, I get up and freaking leave. You can't freaking win when they mess up the shoe like that. But then I find a table where everybody plays by the book - hits when they should, stands when they should - and I just rake it in."

PP: "But what the other players do can't affect your long-term expectation"

TT: "Huh? If they hit, then they took my card. How does that not affect how I do?"

PP: "Whether they play well or poorly, you can only hope to minimize the house's edge to 0.5% (unless you count cards.) Play $5 tables for 40 hours a week and you will lose hundreds of dollars."

TT: "Bullsh!t. I've probably won like ten grand this year alone."

If you don't find that conversation hilarious, send me a note. Let's play cards sometime!

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